


7/25 blaze it lmao

by Geek_Bean



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, dix doesn’t know what she’s doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2019-10-24 09:06:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17701442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geek_Bean/pseuds/Geek_Bean
Summary: Making a group chat to connect with your class never works out the way you hope, does it?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i hate this

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru added 15 others to the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: Hello class! I have decided it would be a good idea to create a group chat so we can communicate well with each other!

[Yasuhiro Hagakure]: Hmm

[Leon Kuwata]: Let’s get this bread

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: I already feel as though I’ve made a mistake. 

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: Oowada! This is meant to bring us together as a class!

[Mondo Oowada]: Gonna have to pass. 

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: At least give it a chance. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Piss off

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Leon Kuwata]: Dude, he’s just going to keep adding you. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Fine you asshole

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: If you’re not going to cooperate, at least be respectful!

[Leon Kuwata]: Kiddo. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Buddy Chum Pal. 

[Leon Kuwata has changed Kiyotaka Ishimaru’s name to Dad™]

[Dad™]: ..?

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: It’s a meme,,

[Dad™]: ..

[Dad™]: A what?

[Leon Kuwata]: Wait

[Leon Kuwata]: Wait wait wait

[Leon Kuwata]: Please say you’re joking. 

[Dad™]: I’m afraid I’m not.

[Leon Kuwata]: GIVE ME A FUCKING MINUTE

[Dad™]: Language!

[Leon Kuwata]: https://youtu.be/4Bj-f29iMIc

[Leon Kuwata]: WATCH

[Leon Kuwata]: NOW

[Yasuhiro Hagakure]: FUCK YA CHIcKEN STRIPS

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: haha i do that

[Hifumi Yamada]: I mean four female ghostbusters the feminists are taking over

[Aoi Asahina]: STOP I COULD’VE DROPPED MY CROISSANT 

[Makoto Naegi]: He needs some milk 

[Junko Enoshima]: ITS COLD OUTSIDE BUT IM STILL DRESSIN LIKE A THOTTIE BECAUSE A HOE NEVER GETS COLD

[Sayaka Maizono]: and they were roommates 

[Leon Kuwata]: oh my god, they were roommates 

[Mondo Oowada]: I cant believe I’m in a fucking class with you people

[Leon Kuwata]: Dude. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Dude please. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Go away

[Leon Kuwata]: I am begging. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Finish

[Leon Kuwata]: The

[Leon Kuwata]: Trend

[Mondo Oowada]: ..

[Mondo Oowada]: What the FUCK is up kyle

[Leon Kuwata]: OH MY GOD

[Leon Kuwata]: HE DID IT

[Leon Kuwata]: WE DID IT

[Dad™]: ...

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: We fucked up a perfectly good Ishimaru is what we did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety. 

[Dad™ has left the chat]

[Mondo Oowada has added Kiyotaka Ishimaru to the chat]

[Mondo Oowada]: If I cant escape hell neither can you. 

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: That’s fair.

[Leon Kuwata]: Anyways. Name time. 

[Leon Kuwata has changed their name to Cool Guy Syndrome]

[Mondo Oowada]: Stop

[Cool Guy Syndrome has changed Mondo Oowada’s name to Bitch]

[Bitch]: Bitch

[Kiyotaka Ishimaru]: Please be respectful!

[Cool Guy Syndrome has changed Kiyotaka Ishimaru’s name to Dad™]

[Bitch has changed their name to 12 inch corn]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Thats a lie and we both know it

[12 inch corn]: You sound like you’ve seen it before

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I haven’t seen it and that’s exactly why I know that’s a lie

[12 inch corn]: Then you technicaly have a short one with that logic 

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: You spelled technically wrong

[12 inch corn]: I’m a biker not a scolar

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: Scholar.

[12 inch corn]: FUCK OFF

[Dad™]: Do you need a tutor? There’s plenty in the school I can ask to help you.

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Ohhh

[12 inch corn]: Fuck off you condescending nerd

[Dad™]: ..?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Wait 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Oh my god dude he was serious 

[Dad™]: Why wouldn’t I be?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I thought you were making fun of his 1 IQ Im-

[Dad™]: You shouldn’t say that about him. If he had a 1 IQ I doubt he’d be able to use a phone. 

[Dad™]: His education means as much to me as my own and all of yours’. I’d like to see you all succeed. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I

[12 inch corn]: ...

[Dad™]: Let me know if you need one. 

[Aoi Asahina]: Ishimaru?

[Dad™]: Yes?

[Aoi Asahina]: I would now die for you

[Dad™]: Please don’t. I’d like everyone to stay alive. 

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: And we’re back

[Dad™]: Also, Oowada.

[Dad™ has changed 12 inch corn’s name to Inappropriate]

[Inappropriate]: Wow okay bitch

[Aoi Asahina]: WAIT I JUST THOUGHT OF THE PERFECT NAME FOR ISHIMARU 

[Aoi Asahina changed Dad™’s name to Taka Tuesday]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: You genius 

[Taka Tuesday]: I appreciate you thought of a good name for me, but I’m afraid I may have to pass. 

[Aoi Asahina]: Aw :(( Give me a second 

[Aoi Asahina changed Taka Tuesday’s name to Dad™]

[Dad™]: I’ll admit, this name has grown on me. Even if I still don’t know why you call me that when I may be younger than a majority of all of you.

[Aoi Asahina]: Wait whens your birthday?

[Aoi Asahina]: When’s everyone’s birthday actually? 

[Dad™]: August 31st!

[Mukuro Ikusaba]: Junko and I were born December 24th. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: January 3rd

[Yasuhiro Hagakure]: Fuckin uhhhhhhh

[Sakura Oogami]: I was born the 13th of September. 

[Makoto Naegi]: February 5th!!

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: March 14th

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: October 6th

[Makoto Naegi]: Oml you’re actually alive

[Aoi Asahina]: I was born April 24th!!

[Aoi Asahina]: We’re still missing a few people though..

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: Hagakure randomly went offline after his reply

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: Toko is likely writing

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: Byakuya and Celestia probably don’t want to be involved with us

[Dad™]: Why not?

[Aoi Asahina]: You pure man. Ignore them :(

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: And another chapter of the manga Hifumi is currently ready probably got posted today, he’s only texted once this whole time

[Kyoko Kirigiri]: However..

[Inappropriate]: I don’t have any reason to tell you fucks my birthday 

[Inappropriate]: It’s not like you’re going to celebrate it

[Aoi Asahina]: Why do you think I’m asking you guys?? I at least have to get you McDonalds or something. 

[Inappropriate]: I don’t like McDonalds. 

[Aoi Asahina]: Have you even tried anything from McDonalds?

[Inappropriate]: ...

[Inappropriate has left the chat]

[Aoi Asahina]: WOW

[Dad™ has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Dad™]: I don’t understand why you try to act so stand offish when we’re just trying to be nice!

[Mondo Oowada]: I don’t need friends. They disappoint me. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Did you just 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ANYWAYS

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Names. 

[Yasuhiro Hagakure]: JULY 25ST

[Dad™]: ...It’s 25th, not 25st.

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: and so we have our first name

[Cool Guy Syndrome changes Yasuhiro Hagakure’s name to 7/25 blaze it]

[Dad™]: Please tell me you’re not implying what I think you are. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: hahahahahah uh

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Makoto Naegi’s name to 52,528,509 likes]

[52,527,509 likes]: Is this that egg from Instagram?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Absolutely. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Sayaka Maizono’s name to owes me $2]

[owes me $2]: Why

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: BECAUSE YOU DO AND I NEED MONEY

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Chihiro Fujisaki’s name to haha i do that]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Byakuya Togami’s name to dead :((]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Toko Fukawa’s name to Gay Fear]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Hifumi Yamada’s name to anime bitches i look at her tiddies]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Sakura Oogami’s name to Scary Lesbian #2]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Celestia Ludenberg’s name to Scary Lesbian #3]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Mukuro Ikusaba’s name to Just Plain Old Scary]

[Mondo Oowada]: Who the fuck is #1

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Tenko

[7/25 blaze it]: yeah that makes sense

[7/25 blaze it changed Mondo Oowada’s name to Angry Rat Dog]

[Angry Rat Dog]: EXCUSE YOU

[Dad™]: Now that’s just offensive to the dogs..

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: OH MY GOD ISHIMARU JUST THREW THE WORST SHADE HAHSJSJSSK

[Dad™]: What? You shouldn’t call them rats..

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: OH

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: False alarm 

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Aoi Asahina’s name to watch naruto lesbian]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Junko Enoshima’s name to Scary But In A Very Different Way]

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Kyoko Kirigiri’s name to Sherlock]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: There

[Angry Rat Dog]: your awful at naming things 

[Dad™]: You’re. 

[Angry Rat Dog has left the chat]


	2. Valentine’s Day

[Leon Kuwata has added 6 others to the chat]

[Leon Kuwata changed Hagakure Yasuhiro’s name to 4/20]

[Leon Kuwata changed Mondo Oowada’s name to tiny corn]

[Leon Kuwata changed Byakuya Togami’s name to lonely]

[Leon Kuwata changed Kiyotaka Ishimaru’s name to Still A Dad]

[Leon Kuwata changed Makoto Naegi’s name to egg gang]

[Leon Kuwata changed Hifumi Yamada’s name to Less Lonely But Still Lonely]

[Leon Kuwata changed their name to Cool Guy Syndrome]

[tiny corn]: First of all, fuck you.

[tiny corn changed their name to corn bread]

[corn bread]: Now

[corn bread]: What the fuck is going on

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed the chats name to Valentines Day Fuckin’ Gossip]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: This is what the fuck is going on

[Still A Dad]: Is this just the guys..?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Yup

[Still A Dad]: Are you sure it’s everyone?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I’m pretty sure, why?

[Still A Dad]: I thought I heard there were 8 boys, but I just checked. Everyone’s here.

[corn bread]: Dumbass. 

[Still A Dad]: Hey!

[corn bread]: But I still don’t get what this is for.

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Valentine’s Day is in a few days. So we need to find out whose getting chocolate. Duh.

[corn bread has left the chat]

[Cool Guy Syndrome has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Come on dude, even if you’re gay you can help us out.

[Mondo Oowada]: Fuck you, I’m straight. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Just not interested in any of the girls. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Not even outside of our class? Come on 

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Mondo Oowada’s name to Party Pooper]

[Party Pooper has changed their name to Fucking Mondo]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Guys who’s fucking Mondo? An unexpected bottom I know

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Oh wait, he just took “go fuck yourself” literally. No wonder he won’t get chocolates tomorrow. 

[Fucking Mondo]: I will fucking murder you 

[Still A Dad]: Please be respectful to each other. 

[Fucking Mondo]: Be gone thot

[lonely]: Mighty words coming from someone with that username. 

[Fucking Mondo]: why iS THIS WHEN YOU CHOSE TO COME ON

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: NEVER MIND THIS CHAT HAS A NEW PURPOSE

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed the chats name to Roast Mondo]

[Fucking Mondo]: IM FUCKING COMING FOR ALL OF YOU AND YOURE FIRST WITH YOUR FUCKASS FACIAL HAIR

[4/20]: Y’all ever grow facial hair to flex on Mondo

[Fucking Mondo]: FUCK YOU

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I thought you were fucking yourself? Byakuya was right 

[Cool Guy Syndrome changed Fucking Mondo’s name to thot]

 

[egg gang]: You guys broke him

[egg gang]: Hes curled up in the hall screaming

 

-> Main Chat

[watch naruto lesbian]: Is Mondo okay? He stopped screaming but he also stopped moving entirely

[watch naruto lesbian]: Someone come pick him up

[Scary Lesbian #2]: I’ll come get him. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Thanks Sakura!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Oh my god Makoto wasn’t lying

[52,791,232 likes]: Why would I lie about this

[owes me $2]: What happened?

[Dad™ sent a picture]

[Dad™]: Leon made a chat for the boys which just became everyone making fun of Mondo. 

[haha i do that]: ...Can I ask something?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Shoot. 

[haha i do that]: Why was there an all guys chat?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Wanted to know if anyone had any idea on who was getting chocolates. 

[owes me $2]: You have absolutely no shame, you know that?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: You say that a lot 

[haha i do that]: I’ll probably get obligatory chocolates for everyone, if that helps!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: :o

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Bless your beautiful face

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: @owes me $2 at least SOMEONE appreciates me. 

[owes me $2]: You’re no better

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: >:(

 

[Feb. 14]

-> Main Chat

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I GOT CHOCOLATES THAT WERENT OBLIGATORY HELL FUCKING YESSSSSSSSS

[owes me $2]: Good for you. 

[52,792,006 likes]: I got a few too, but I don’t know who any are from..

[Mondo Oowada]: It’s just chocolate 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ur jealous 

[Mondo Oowada]: Fuck off 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ur not denying it

[Mondo Oowada]: FUCK OFF

[Dad™]: Language!

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ISHI WAIT BEFORE YOU ADD HIM BACK

[Dad™]: Oh?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I gotta talk without him for a sex

[owes me $2]: sex

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: fUck you im trying to be serious

[Dad™]: It’s mean to talk behind someone’s back. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Yes but Mondo seemed super angry today and I think it’s because he doesn’t get chocolates

[haha i do that]: oh

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Seriously, the dude had none on his desk like the rest of us

[haha i do that]: ..would now be a good time to say he also looked super scary and I got too scared to actually give him his

[watch naruto lesbian]: Aw, Chihiro!! I’m sure he’d never hurt you!!

[watch naruto lesbian]: I can agree he is sort of scary, but he’s probably a huge softie inside!!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I think it’s the fact he could damn well snap us like a stick one by one if he wanted to

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I mean, that’s why Sakura terrified me at first

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: No offense

[Scary Lesbian #2]: None taken. I get it a lot. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Aw!! We love you, Sakura!!

[haha i do that]: Yeah!!

[Dad™]: Agreed!

[owes me $2]: WHOLESOME

[Dad™]: But Leon has a point. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: See?? 

[Dad™]: You could always leave them outside his door, though.

[watch naruto lesbian]: Good idea!!

[watch naruto lesbian]: let’s go lesbians let’s go

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: iconic

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: thats all i had to say

[Cool Guy Syndrome added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Welcome back you demon fuck

[Mondo Oowada]: Those were the best 5 minutes of my life

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: stfu you probably cried to your mommy because we almost kicked you out

 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Mondo?

[Mondo Oowada]: You know I can see the messages sent before I was added

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Fuck, I forgot to delete those

[haha i do that]: oh..

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ..

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Well we fucked up

[owes me $2]: Yeah no fucking shit

[haha i do that]: Was it because we said he was scary..?

[watch naruto lesbian]: It might be..

[haha i do that]: Oh..

[watch naruto lesbian]: Dont worry Chihiro!! I’m sure we can just apologize. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Let’s add him back.

 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Hahahahahah we’re all pussies

[watch naruto lesbian]: You think?

[Dad™]: I believe it’s better you do it in person. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Yeah taka please do it

[Dad™]: Why me?

[Dad™]: I didn’t say anything about him. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: please you’re our dad and we’re also all pussies

[Dad™]: ..Fine. 

[Dad™]: I’ll add him back and try to convince him to stay. However, I believe you’re all the ones that should apologize. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: God bless

[Dad™ added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Dad™]: Before you leave again, we apologize for anything we said that hurt you. However they were simply wondering why you were so angry. 

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Dad™ has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Mondo Oowada]: Jesus fucking christ what do you want from me

[Dad™]: For you to stay. 

[Mondo Oowada]: All of you know I’m not going to stop trying to leave this shitty chat

[Mondo Oowada]: I’m not mad you called me scary though. 

[Mondo Oowada]: I’m not mad in general 

[Mondo Oowada]: Okay that’s a lie

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I was about to say. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: And we’re back

[watch naruto lesbian]: Welcome back corn man!

[owes me $2]: Fr though, why’d you leave again?

[Mondo Oowada]: I don’t like people talking behind my back. Period. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Periodt*

[Mondo Oowada]: Shut the fuck up. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: You love me

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: But why were you mad

[Mondo Oowada]: ..

[Mondo Oowada]: Valentine’s day is a slap in the face over the 12 girl losing streak I have

[Mondo Oowada]: The not even obligatory chocolates from anyone didn’t help 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: T

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Twelve

[Mondo Oowada]: SHUT THE FUCK UP

[watch naruto lesbian]: I’m sorry I didn’t give you any!! They got crushed in my bag and I have to get another box

[haha i do that]: I left yours outside your door!

[Mondo Oowada]: Yeah, I got them. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Thanks kid. 

[haha i do that]: :)!!

[watch naruto lesbian]: Is anyone in this chat even in a relationship?

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Not that I know of. We haven’t known each other for longer than a month. 

[Dad™]: Celestia might be, it’s always a gamble with her..

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Did you just

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Make a pun

[Dad™]: A what?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Never mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chihiro is a guy in this dw,, he’s just yet to spill the secret (implied when taka said there were eight guys but only counted seven)


	3. Movies and Unexpected Pairs

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Guys. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Please tell me I wasn’t the only one who saw Mondo this morning. 

[Dad™]: I saw him too. Why?

[watch naruto lesbian]: WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY

[watch naruto lesbian]: HE HAD PINK PAJAMA BOTTOMS AND HIS HAIR WAS DOWN

[Dad™]: Oh, that.

[Dad™]: I thought it was weird too.

[haha i do that]: I watched him walk back into his room with a piece of toast stuffed in his mouth and will never be the same. 

[haha i do that]: Did you guys see his shirt??

[52,753,998 likes]: The oversized white shirt that just said “flannel shirt??” Iconic 

[7/25 blaze it]: He didn’t even put anything on his toast. What The Fuck. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Thats the most coherent sentence I’ve heard come from your mouth and you’re in your twenties. 

[owes me $2]: He was wearing dog slippers. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: WAIT OMG WHAT

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: @Mondo Oowada IS IT TRUE

[Mondo Oowada]: Is what true

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: THE SLIPPERS

[Mondo Oowada]: No. 

[owes me $2 sent a picture]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: OH MY GOD

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: AHAHA

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: brb sending this to every person i know

[Mondo Oowada]: DO NOT

[Dad™]: Aw, they’re cute. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Shut the FUCK up

[Dad™]: Language!

[watch naruto lesbian]: Anyways, I have a bunch of Disney movies!! Does anyone want to have a marathon?? It’s the weekend anyways!

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Do you need help setting up?

[watch naruto lesbian]: I think I’m good!! But you can come with me to the store to get snacks!!

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Alright. 

[owes me $2]: Ohh!! Do you have Cinderella?

[watch naruto lesbian]: Of course! I have all the princess movies. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: We can watch one movie for every person going.

[Dad™]: ...

[Dad™]: Now would be a good time to ask what Disney is, wouldn’t it?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: HOLD UP

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: WHAT SORT OF ROCK DO YOU LIVE UNDER

[Dad™]: Extreme debt. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh that makes sense

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Taka has to come

[Dad™]: Okay!

[watch naruto lesbian]: okay children (and dad) what snacks would you like 

[Mondo Oowada]: Bleach so you can’t force me to go. 

[Dad™]: Mondo! Not even joking about that is a good thing!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Funny how you think death will get you out of this. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Gummy bears for the overly dramatic man in the back!

[Mondo Oowada]: Fuck you, I’m not going.

[watch naruto lesbian]: Aw man, now I have to set it up in your room!

[Mondo Oowada]: ABSOLUTELY THE FUCK NOT

[watch naruto lesbian]: Then come.

[Mondo Oowada]: Fuck you. 

[Mondo Oowada]: I’ll bring my own damn copy of lady and the tramp. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Why am I surprised that’s your movie?

[Mondo Oowada]: Its more of the nostalgia factor. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Oh???¿??

[Mondo Oowada]: If you’re expecting me to tell you, no. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: :)

[Mondo Oowada]: Leon. 

[Mondo Oowada]: LEON STOP KNOCKING ON MY DOOR

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: :)))

[Mondo Oowada]: FUCKING FINE ILL TELL YOU BUT GO BACK TO YOUR DORM YOU DEMON ASS LOOKING BITCH

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Damn, okay. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Im in my room now. Tell thy story. 

[Mondo Oowada]: ..

[Dad™]: You told him you would (In a very rude manner, might I add!). I am rather curious too, despite not knowing what the movie is. 

[Mondo Oowada]: ...

[Mondo Oowada]: It was the only kid’s movie my brother had for a while once shit hit the fan. He’d play it for me when I got sick or didn’t want to go to school because of something and would always say I’d find someone like Lady. Just human. 

[Mondo Oowada]: We haven’t really watched a movie together since the gang started. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Thats..

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Actually really cute. 

[Scary Lesbian #2]: You should watch a movie with him. It sounds like you grew distant. 

[Mondo Oowada]: ...

[Mondo Oowada]: Don’t tell me what to do. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Okay but.. the fact he compared you to the tramp. 

[Mondo Oowada]: SHUT UP

[Mondo Oowada]: IT MADE MORE SENSE AT THE TIME

[owes me $2]: tell us more :0

[Mondo Oowada]: You already pushed it with making me come to this shit in the first place. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ;)

[Mondo Oowada]: GOOD GOD FINE I’ll tell you just. Never wink at me again. 

[Mondo Oowada]: I was a clever kid. I knew how to trick people well enough to get by for a few years until he found a way to get things stable again. 

[Dad™]: ...

[Mondo Oowada]: Before you say anything we were still young

[Dad™]: You were what?

[Mondo Oowada]: Never fucking mind. 

[Mondo Oowada]: If one of you brings this back up again I will throw you off the building. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Ah..

[watch naruto lesbian]: We got snacks! I’ll send a picture and see if anyone wants something else.

[watch naruto lesbian sent a picture]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Looks good! I can get pizza, if you guys want some. 

[owes me $2]: Yaa

[haha i do that]: Im late but do you have Mulan?

[watch naruto lesbian]: Yep!!

[watch naruto lesbian]: Meet up by my room!! I’ll be there in a few minutes with Sakura!

[watch naruto lesbian]: If the door is open you guys can go in and get comfortable just don’t! touch! anything!!

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Mondo, you can’t back out. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Jesus. Okay. 

 

[9:23 pm]

[Leon Kuwata added 14 others to the chat]

[Leon Kuwata]: Guys. Am I hallucinating or. 

[Aoi Asahina]: No. No you’re not.

[Sayaka Maizono]: ?? I went to go get napkins, what happened?

[Mondo Oowada]: STOP

[Leon Kuwata sent a picture]

[Leon Kuwata]: THIS HAPPENED

[Mondo Oowada]: DELETE DELETE DELETE 

[Sayaka Maizono]: ..

[Sayaka Maizono]: PLEASE give me context ohmygosh 

[Aoi Asahina]: Mondo and Ishimaru both brought really thin blankets and I only had one spare so they agreed to share. 

[Aoi Asahina]: Ishimaru obviously doesn’t stay up past 9:00 and ended up falling asleep against Mondo

[Aoi Asahina]: He’s so clearly freaking out oh my g o d

[Sayaka Maizono]: YOU LEGALLY CANT MOVE UNTIL I GET THERE AND SEE FOR MYSELF

[Leon Kuwata]: OH MY GOD HURRY THE UGLCM UP NSBSJSKSJ

[Aoi Asahina]: BSGSJSJSJSHSH HURRY COME SEE THID

[Mondo Oowada]: HHHHELP ME

[Sakura Oogami]: Leon and Asahina just freaked out and can’t type, so I’ll update you on what happened. 

[Sakura Oogami]: Ishimaru slipped into his lap. 

[Sayaka Maizono]: PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN

[Mondo Oowada]: LEAVE ME ALONE

[Leon Kuwata sent a picture]

[Sayaka Maizono]: YOURE SHAKING THE CAMERA I CANT SEE YOU DUMB FUCK

[Chihiro Fujisaki sent a picture]

[Aoi Asahina]: ITS HAPPENING. THIS IS REAL

[Sayaka Maizono]: I LEFT FOR FIVE FUCKING MINUTES IM BOLTING BACK TO YOUR DORM

[Aoi Asahina]: I DONT THINK HES MOVING HE LOOKS PRETTY COMFORTABLE 

[Mondo Oowada]: FUCKING STOP

[Mondo Oowada]: I HATE THIS ENOUGH AS IS

[Mondo Oowada]: I DIDNT EVEN WANT TO SHARE THE BLANKET WITH HIM

[Leon Kuwata]: THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE SAYS OTHERWISE 

[Leon Kuwata]: AHSHAJHS HE JUST FUCKING THREW HIS PHONE AND PULLED TBE BLANLET OVER HIS FACE HURRY THE FUCK UP SAYAKA

[Sayaka Maizono]: IM DOWN THE HALL

[Leon Kuwata]: GO GO GO

 

[Sayaka Maizono]: IM SHAKIGN AND CRYING I CANT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING 

[Leon Kuwata]: I KNOW

[Leon Kuwata]: Did Mondo give up on his 12 girl streak and go for boys

[Mondo Oowada]: SHUT THE FUCK UP

[Mondo Oowada]: I DONT LIKE HIM AT ALL PERIOD

[Leon Kuwata]: YEAH OKAY LMAO

[Sayaka Maizono]: LITERALLY NONE OF THE LIGHTS ARE ON AND YOU’RE FURTHEST AWAY FROM THE TV AND WE CAN SEE HOW RED YOU ARE

[Sayaka Maizono]: YA DAMN LUCKY HES IN YOUR LAP BECAUSE WED PROBABLY SEE MOrE IF HE WASNT COVERING IT

[Mondo Oowada]: ??? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN

[Aoi Asahina]: OH MY GOD SAYAKA IS LEAVING NO SURVIVORS 

[Aoi Asahina]: YALL CAN HEAR ME WHEEZING RUGJT NOW

[Mondo Oowada]: WAIT

[Mondo Oowada]: WHAT THE FUCK SAYAKA

[Sayaka Maizono]: YOURE NOT DENYING IT

[Mondo Oowada]: SHUT THE FUCK UP I DO NOT HAVE A FUCKING BONER WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK

[Leon Kuwata]: LISTEN MAN CAN YOU PROVE THAT

[Mondo Oowada]: I WILL NOT TAKE A PICTURE OF MY CROTCH AND YOU BETTER STAY THE FUCK OVER THERE

[Leon Kuwata]: HAHA OKAY DUDE

[Leon Kuwata]: YOURE NOT HELPING YOUR CASE THOUGH

 

[12:36 AM]

[Sakura Oogami]: I believe Mondo is asleep now as well. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Guys im fucking crying we’re in the middle of the lady and the tramp scene did he find his lady

[Sayaka Maizono]: OHMYGOSJ THEY ACTUALLY LOOK CUTE AND THEY’RE NOT WVEN DATING YET

[Aoi Asahina]: “Yet”

[Sayaka Maizono]: Listen you can NOT pull shit like this and then not end up dating it’s a fact of life

[Aoi Asahina]: Fair enough

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: Are.. they cuddling?

[Aoi Asahina]: OMG CHIHIRO IS RIGHT

[Leon Kuwata]: WAIT wHAT

[Aoi Asahina]: MONDO WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND HIM

[Sayaka Maizono]: If we have not collectively agreed to be their wingmen and women I’ve lost hope in all of you. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Of course, what are we, heathens?

 

 

[Makoto Naegi]: I cant believe I slept through that..

[Makoto Naegi]: But they’re both still asleep?

[Sakura Oogami]: Ishimaru woke up at one point, but couldn’t move without waking up Mondo and went back to sleep. 

[Sakura Oogami]: Leon and Asahina fell asleep close to six in the morning, so they’ll be asleep for some time. 

 

 

[Sakura Oogami]: I was wrong. 

[Leon Kuwata]: I HAVE NEVER HEARD MONDO SCREAM THAT LOUD OR AT ALL HOLY FUCK

[Makoto Naegi]: whAt What happened I just left???

[Aoi Asahina]: Mondo woke up, realized he was cuddling Ishimaru, and started screaming

[Chihiro Fujisaki]: It’d be funnier if he didn’t start yelling..

[Aoi Asahina]: Rip Mondo

[Mondo Oowada]: WHY DID NONE OF YOU FUCKS WAKE ME UP

[Mondo Oowada]: I AM NEVER TALKING TO ANY OF YOU AGAIN

[Leon Kuwata]: Mmmk

[Mondo Oowada]: FUCK YOU YOU LITTLE SHITS

[Leon Kuwata]: Hey, you’re gonna have to talk to your wingmen you know

[Mondo Oowada]: WHY THE FUCK DO I NEED A WINGMAN 

[Leon Kuwata]: DUDE

[Leon Kuwata]: DO YOU REALIZED HOW MUCH GAY PANIC YOU RADIATED

[Mondo Oowada has left the chat]

[Sayaka Maizono has added Mondo Oowada to the chat]

[Sayaka Maizono]: Gay disaster confirmed

[Mondo Oowada]: ...

[Mondo Oowada]: ...Bi. I think it’s bi. 

[Leon Kuwata]: :000000

[Mondo Oowada]: FUCK YOU AND FORGET IT

[Leon Kuwata]: I didn’t say anything 

[Leon Kuwata]: I’m more or less happy because .0. same

[Mondo Oowada]: Please never make that face again. 

[Leon Kuwata]: Thats fair

 

 

 

 

 

[Mondo Oowada —> Daiya Oowada]

[Mondo Oowada]: Im coming home today with snacks you fuckhead. 

[Daiya Oowada]: Hi to you too, Mon. 

[Daiya Oowada]: Any reason?

[Mondo Oowada]: The hell you mean. 

[Daiya Oowada]: Like, bringing home anyone?

[Mondo Oowada]: ...

[Daiya Oowada]: ...

[Daiya Oowada]: Okay, kid, what do you need. 

[Mondo Oowada]: ...

[Daiya Oowada]: Kid?

 

[Mondo Oowada]: I miss you. I miss our damn Disney movie nights and your fucking shitty voice trying to sing and your stupid quoting along to the movie and i miss being your fucking brother. 

 

[Mondo Oowada]: The fucking truck incident has been eating me alive and i want to fucking be who i was to you before instead of the little shit who almost fucking murdered you because he couldn’t handle not being fucking good enough 

 

[Mondo Oowada]: Actually you know what fuck this never mind

[Daiya Oowada]: ...

[Daiya Oowada]: Damn, it took you fifteen minutes to just say you wanted to see me again?

[Daiya Oowada]: I do miss watching stupid stuff with ya. If you hadn’t thrown Lady and the Tramp out I’d say we watch it.

[Mondo Oowada]: I

[Mondo Oowada]: I have it

 

[Mondo Oowada]: Daiya

[Daiya Oowada]: YOU LITTLE SHIT YOU MADE ME THINK YOU THREW AWAY OUR FRIENDSHIP

[Mondo Oowada]: WE’RE FUCKING BROTHERS WHAT DO YOU M E A N FRIENDSHIP

[Daiya Oowada]: I WILL FUCKING KICK YOUR ASS WHEN YOU GET HERE 

[Mondo Oowada]: YOU CANT FUCKING KICK ME WITH A PROSTHETIC 

[Daiya Oowada]: I CAN HIT YOU WITH IT

[Daiya Oowada]: Also, are you planning on at least telling me about a girl?

[Mondo Oowada]: Fuck you im not even coming anymore 

[Daiya Oowada]: Hah, okay. Pizza or no. 

[Mondo Oowada]: Pizza, do you think i’m a heathen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> daiya lives!


	4. mario kart

—> Main Chat

[7/25 blaze it]: what’s more terrifying, the universe having no edge or the universe having an edge

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: its 3 am are you okay

[7/25 blaze it]: NO

[7/25 blaze it]: IF THE UNIVERSE HAs NO END THEN WE’LL NEVER FINISH EXPLORING IT NO MATTER HOW DAMN HARD WE TRY BUT IF IT DOES HAVE AN END WHAT IS AT THE EDGE OF THE UNIVERSE 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: HIRO OMG CALM DOWN

[7/25 blaze it]: I CANT

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: GO TO SLEEP

[7/25 blaze it]: NO U

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Yeah that’s fair

[owes me $2]: its fucking 3:23 am you shitheads better have a good fucking excuse for waking me up

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: woah,

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: why am i scared and turned on

[owes me $2]: if you think i won’t hesitate to come to your fucking dorm right now and murder you you better lock your fucking door and window

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ,,

[watch naruto lesbian]: leon please say that message wasn’t serious

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: ,,,,,,,,,

[owes me $2]: hes a horny 16 year old

[owes me $2]: of course he’s serious

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: y’all are fuckin mean

[7/25 blaze it]: when you erase words on a paper where does it go

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: H i r o

[watch naruto lesbian]: i

[watch naruto lesbian]: oh fuck

[Dad™]: Everyone, being up this late is harmful to your health! Please go to sleep!

[watch naruto lesbian]: oof we got busted

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: busted more like bust down thotian

[7/25 blaze it]: he was murdered before he could finish

[owes me $2]: ok i get all of you but why is taka awake

[7/25 blaze it]: Oh shit you have a point

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh f

[Dad™]: i

[owes me $2]: well?

[Dad™]: ,,

[Dad™]: Go to bed!

[watch naruto lesbian]: Well we can’t now! We have to solve this mystery!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: whats new scooby doo,,

[owes me $2]: SHUT UP

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: :(

[7/25 blaze it]: Shaggy is God. He only needs 0.00001% of his power to save us from our impending doom. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: praise shaggy

[Dad™]: ..?

[watch naruto lesbian]: stop it patrick you’re scaring him

 

>8:45 AM

—> Main Chat

[dead :((]: What on earth is this garbage?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Where You Belong

[dead :((]: Did you just try to call me garbage? I’m worth more than your damn house, Kuwata.

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Damn dude

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: But hey gold is pretty expensive but in minecraft its fuckin trash so checkmate

[dead :((]: What the hell. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: Who else plays minecraft unironically in this good christian server

[7/25 blaze it]: togami’s clearly the only one who doesn’t bc he’s a virgin >:(

[dead :((]: Well of course I don’t, I have better things to do than play brain cell killing games. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: video games make u smarter >:(

[dead :((]: I highly doubt that. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Hey we should have a mario kart tournament 

[watch naruto lesbian]: HELL YES

[watch naruto lesbian]: I WILL CRUSH ALL OF YOU

[dead :((]: I hope you all have fun without me. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: We will! Since you’re too dumb to play. 

[dead :((]: What brains does this game need? It’s just a waste of time. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: You need to be extra focused and plan things carefully if you’re gonna win!

[watch naruto lesbian]: unless you can’t 

[dead :((]: Fine. I’ll come just to prove to you idiots that I can do better than any of you at a game that doesn’t even require brains. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Fuck yeah that’s the spirit

[watch naruto lesbian]: I still have leftover snacks from our movie night!!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: i’ll get my switch set up u nerds 

 

>2:56 pm

[Mondo Oowada]: I just slept for 17 hours wh at the fu c k

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Are you okay,

[Mondo Oowada]: NO

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Were having a mario kart tournament tonight 

[Mondo Oowada]: ok

[Mondo Oowada]: why are you telling me this

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Damn i thought you’d be a nintendo dude

[Mondo Oowada]: i am. ds was my shit when i was like 8

[Mondo Oowada]: but last time i went to one of your things 

[Mondo Oowada]: Shit Happened 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: it’s ok u can just say you cuddled taka

[Mondo Oowada]: Die

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: No Thanks

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: but pls come we need people who can crush togami because if he wins i’ll never hear the end of it

[Mondo Oowada]: yeah okay

 

>4:58 pm

[haha i do that]: i have the sudden need for hot chocolate 

[haha i do that]: does anyone want some and if so which mug is yours

[owes me $2]: !!! pls mines just the mug with the idol group on it

[watch naruto lesbian]: aaaaaaaaaa mines the red one

[Mondo Oowada]: hmmMM

[Mondo Oowada]: Do you mind making coffee or do i just get up 

[haha i do that]: i can do it! but you’re gonna have to put anything else you want in it

[Mondo Oowada]: your great kid

[Mondo Oowada]: it’s blue and it says have a great day 

[haha i do that]: oddly out of character but okay

[Dad™]: It’s been two hours and you’re not up?

[Dad™]: Your sleep was unhealthy enough as is!

[Mondo Oowada]: You guys hear something because I don’t 

[Dad™]: Mondo! I know you’re seeing these!

[haha i do that]: does anyone else want some 

[Scary Lesbian #2]: I’d like some. 

[7/25 blaze it]: what the Fuck is good my friend please make me some 

[egg gang]: !!! pls

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: woa

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: When’d you change your name

[egg gang]: when the author got tired of having to check the like count of the egg every time i existed

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: What

[egg gang]: what?

[haha i do that]: MONDO

[haha i do that]: YOUR CUP

[Mondo Oowada]: I don’t know what you mean. 

[haha i do that sent a picture]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: thats brilliant i—

[Dad™]: Mondo! That’s inappropriate!

[Mondo Oowada]: Its not my cup we’re all good 

[Mondo Oowada]: I stole it from my brother 

[Dad™]: You what!?

[Mondo Oowada]: He’s flipped off many people with this cup including a cop

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Your brother is fucking amazing 

[Dad™]: He what??

[Mondo Oowada]: He says thank you

[haha i do that]: your guys’ drinks are ready

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: should we start the mario kart tournament 

[Mondo Oowada]: fuck yea

 

>2:53 AM

[Cool Guy Syndrome sent a picture]

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: bow before your god

[Mondo Oowada sent a picture]

[Mondo Oowada]: Pathetic. 

[owes me $2]: i’m not surprised leon owns like five pairs of clout goggles but mondo?? owning seven AND airpods?? while taking a Fuckboy™ picture?? now you’re fucking with me

[Mondo Oowada]: lmao the airpods aren’t mine

[Mondo Oowada]: i stole them off togami 

[dead :((]: OOWADA

[Mondo Oowada]: gotta blast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you’re wondering. the cup had a middle finger on the bottom of it.


	5. moths

>4:33 AM  
—> Main Chat

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: tell me why my sleep paralysis demon that looks like james charles said i look like a twink

[owes me $2]: because you do

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: wow okay love you too

[Mondo Oowada]: your sleep paralysis demon looks like who

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: james. charles. 

[Mondo Oowada]: wh

[Mondo Oowada]: why??

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: the video of him singing that fucking. song. haunts my nightmares. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I go so fucking long without remembering it and then in fucking social studies just

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: BWOMP BWOMP BWOMP

[Mondo Oowada]: stop

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: yeah that’s fair

[owes me $2]: y’all think mothman is real?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: no i KNOW my homeboy is real

[Mondo Oowada]: this conversation does not help when you’re in the middle of an abandoned warehouse next to the woods nobody dares step foot in

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: you’re 6’2

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: and the leader of the biggest gang in the fucking country

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: and with said gang

[Mondo Oowada]: and he’s a fucking moth

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: yeah that’s fair

[7/25 blaze it]: i met him once

[owes me $2]: were you high

[7/25 blaze it]: n,, no,,,,

[Mondo Oowada]: dude you’re always high we can’t believe any of ur shit

[7/25 blaze it]: in my defense you always come back from gang meetings smelling like vape so you probably smoke or get second hand smoke too 

[Mondo Oowada]: good point 

[watch naruto lesbian]: are y’all like.. okay

[Mondo Oowada]: jurys still out

[watch naruto lesbian]: okay but now that you mention it. mondo does always smell like fucking vape in math

[owes me $2 changed Mondo Oowada’s name to wheres my mf juul]

[wheres my mf juul]: wow okay

[owes me $2]: well you’re not denying it

[wheres my mf juul]: i dont vape but like. yeah someone in the gang does and he always insists on standing right fucking next to me and i always end up smelling the worst 

[owes me $2]: fuck

[wheres my mf juul]: i just. smoke

[wheres my mf juul]: except im around hagakure a lot now so i smell like weed too

[watch naruto lesbian]: unholy trinity of weed, cigarettes, and vape

[wheres my mf juul]: zjzhjzbbdsgsus

[owes me $2]: i feel bad for whoever sits near you in class

[wheres my mf juul]: i take showers you disappointing cheeto

[Dad™]: Mondo, you smoke?

[wheres my mf juul]: woah dude

[wheres my mf juul]: why are you awake

[Dad™]: I have my reasons. More importantly, smoking can ruin your body!! You can die!

[wheres my mf juul]: fantastic, how fast

[Dad™]: Mondo!!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: are y’all just magically super close or am i tired

[Dad™]: Yep!!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: aight

 

>3:15 PM  
—> Main Chat

[watch naruto lesbian]: @everyone we have an announcement 

[watch naruto lesbian]: The Lesbians have adopted taka

[wheres my mf juul]: you what??

[watch naruto lesbian]: relax we won’t completely hog him

[watch naruto lesbian]: but The Lesbians have a new gay son and we love him

[Dad™]: Wait,

[Scary Lesbian #3]: I don’t remember getting a say in this. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: because you barely leave your room to talk to us

[watch naruto lesbian]: its just taka!!

[Scary Lesbian #3]: And if I don’t want to take in taka?

[Dad™]: I can go-

[watch naruto lesbian]: we disown you because we Love And Appreciate our child in this Good Christian Household 

[Scary Lesbian #3]: That’s fair 

[Scary Lesbian #3]: I’ll make sure you have fun with us, Ishimaru. 

[Dad™]: I understand your username now..

[wheres my mf juul]: No threatening my bro pls 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: okay i know i already asked about this but i was fuckass tired and didn’t think about it

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: but what the fuck you guys have been at each other’s throats for like a month and now you’re suddenly friends fucking uhhh??? explain please. 

[egg gang]: they had an argument and had a showdown in the sauna and now they’re best friends 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Pardon,

[egg gang]: also Lesbians pls adopt me and chihiro too

[watch naruto lesbian]: let me ask our council

[watch naruto lesbian]: sakura? 

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Yes. 

[watch naruto lesbian]: welcome to our family

[wheres my mf juul]: damn you didn’t even give the other two a chance

[watch naruto lesbian]: because toko hates everyone anyways and celestia is very vague

[watch naruto lesbian]: you absolute walnut

[Dad™]: Be nice!

[watch naruto lesbian]: hsjsjsjsjak sorry

[watch naruto lesbian]: you slight walnut

[Dad™]: I’ll take it, I suppose. 

[owes me $2]: is nobody going to mention the sauna thing or

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh thank god someone said it

[Dad™]: What about the sauna?

[wheres my mf juul]: if u answer that i will physically snap you in half

[Dad™]: ??

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: i

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: nvm

[owes me $2]: yeah

 

>8:22 PM  
—> Main Chat

[7/25 blaze it]: YALL HOLY FUCK

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: WHAT WHAT WHAT

[7/25 blaze it]: i love u guys

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: aw

[7/25 blaze it]: also there’s a huge ass moth in the kitchen

[wheres my mf juul]: WHAT

[watch naruto lesbian]: okay who’s on chancla duty

[Dad™]: Mondo. 

[Scary Lesbian #2]: Mondo. 

[Scary Lesbian #3]: Mondo. 

[owes me $2]: Mondo. 

[haha i do that]: Mondo. 

[wheres my mf juul]: fuck you all okay if i die that’s on all of you motherfuckers

 

>10:16 PM  
—> Main Chat

[wheres my mf juul]: are moths supposed to turn into dust when they die 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: y

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: you were supposed to kill it an hour and a half ago

[wheres my mf juul]: i did

[wheres my mf juul]: it turned into

[wheres my mf juul]: dust. 

[7/25 blaze it]: W h a t

[Dad™]: Mondo. 

[Dad™]: Are those it’s guts. 

[wheres my mf juul]: uh,

[7/25 blaze it]: MONDO

[7/25 blaze it]: DID YOU TOUCH IT

[wheres my mf juul]: HHH

[watch naruto lesbian]: Oh

[watch naruto lesbian]: Oh god


	6. Endgame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i started this chapter like 12 years ago half these memes are outdated

>2:00 AM  
—> Main Chat

[haha i do that]: mondo b like i’m peppa pig

[wheres my mf juul]: i will bash your skull in

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oink oink

[watch naruto lesbian]: i have several questions. 

 

>8:53 AM

[Dad™]: Good morning everyone!

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: i want to Fucking Die

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh good morning taka

[Dad™]: Are you okay??

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: i dunno 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: am i okay, sayaka?

[owes me $2]: I’m not going to say sorry. 

[Dad™]: What happened?

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: SHE PUSHED ME DOWN THE STAIRS

[owes me $2]: It was one flight. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: EXCUSE YOU IT WAS FOUR FLIGHTS AND IN FRONT OF EVERYONE 

[owes me $2]: it wasn’t even that bad

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: MIKAN CRIED WHEN SHE SAW ME

[owes me $2]: because you were screaming

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: AND BECAUSE MY NOSE WAS BLEEDING!

[owes me $2]: no, just because you were screaming

[Dad™]: Sayaka! Apologize!

[owes me $2]: ok

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: thank u taka

[owes me $2]: i’m sorry you’re a little bitch

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: WOW

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: IT BE LIKE THAT HUH

 

>12:28 AM

[wheres my mf juul]: if the store is 10 miles away from my house and an average human walks at 2 mph then why has my dad taken 15 years to come back from the grocery store

[Dad™]: Mondo..

[Dad™]: Thats wrong, average people walk at 3.1 mph. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: wow

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: it be like that sometimes huh

[wheres my mf juul]: damn taka wtf

 

>4:20 PM

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: good morning gamers Let’s Get This Bread

[Dad™]: I don’t think I can. I have a gluten allergy. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I-

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: oh

 

>6:50 PM

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Guys guys guys

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Guess who’s a couple

[7/25 blaze it]: aoi and sakura

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Well- yes, but actually no

[7/25 blaze it]: Makoto and Kyoko

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: no

[7/25 blaze it]: Makoto and Togami???

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Hiro they’re not in our class

[7/25 blaze it]: oh

[7/25 blaze it]: ....

[7/25 blaze it]: Taka and Mondo??

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: this is why you scored lowest on the midterms

 

>2:20 AM

[wheres my mf juul]: it is so FUCKING HOT i’m melting 

[owes me $2]: aye we’re both in pain

[owes me $2]: it feels like i’ve been repeatedly stabbed

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: I got whacked with a baseball and it still hurts so I guess I’m in the club

[Scary Lesbian #3]: I agree with Mondo. It feels like there’s a fire somewhere. 

[Dad™]: It feels like all of us are in pain today. Chihiro and I have headaches. 

[anime bitches i look at her tiddies]: my head hurts too

[egg gang]: i fell down a trash chute. does that count for anything?

[watch naruto lesbian]: it’s 2 am dont ya think sleeping would i dunno

[watch naruto lesbian]: h e l p

[wheres my mf juul]: how the fuck do you expect me to sleep i’m fucking dying

[egg gang]: taka’s always cold. go hug him for like 10 minutes. 

[Dad™]: I’m in my dorm, if you decide to. 

[wheres my mf juul]: i will be over in 2 minutes 

[Dad™]: door is unlocked

[Dad™]: and you’re already here, okay

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: use protection

[Dad™]: ???

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: inside joke

[wheres my mf juul]: die

 

Leon Kuwata —> Sayaka Maizono

[Leon Kuwata]: You good?

[Sayaka Maizono]: what

[Leon Kuwata]: you said your stomach hurts

[Leon Kuwata]: are you ok

[Sayaka Maizono]: Oh

[Sayaka Maizono]: Yes, I’m fine

[Leon Kuwata]: I have leftover easter chocolate,, if you want some,,

[Sayaka Maizono]: That actually does sound good

[Sayaka Maizono]: I’ll be over in a few minutes 

[Leon Kuwata]: No Im fine coming to your dorm-

[Leon Kuwata]: mine looks like shit and smells like weed anyways 

[Sayaka Maizono]: Ok,,?

[Sayaka Maizono]: Why are you so nice right now

[Leon Kuwata]: wym

[Sayaka Maizono]: like

[Sayaka Maizono]: this feels out of character 

[Leon Kuwata]: I mean

[Leon Kuwata]: Feeling like you’ve been stabbed with knives never sounds fun? Or good?

[Sayaka Maizono]: it doesn’t 

[Sayaka Maizono]: just come hurry to my dorm 

[Leon Kuwata]: ok

 

>6:00 PM

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: who wants endgame spoilers 

[haha i do that]: mention that movie again and i’ll fucking kill you and your ugly ass goatee 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Holy fuck i was kidding

[wheres my mf juul]: ur mom died in endgame

[haha i do that]: MONDO WHATD I SAY

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Peppa Pig died in endgame

[Dad™]: But Mondo just texted us

[wheres my mf juul]: bitch i-

 

>6:00 AM

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: Who’s screaming

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: And why

[wheres my mf juul]: ????

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: i’m in the common room and i just hear. screaming. 

[wheres my mf juul]: i just came out of my room and i hear it too

[wheres my mf juul]: um??

[watch naruto lesbian]: Hiro and I just got back from endgame. 

[wheres my mf juul]: ah

[wheres my mf juul]: i’m surprised you’re not joining him

[watch naruto lesbian] I’m too devastated to even open my mouth.

[wheres my mf juul]: yeah that makes sense

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: both of you are a mood though

[7/25 blaze it]: i cant believe leon killed sayaka in endgame 

[Scary But In A Very Different Way]: Woah, spoiler alert. 

[7/25 blaze it]: what

[watch naruto lesbian]: what

[wheres my mf juul]: what

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: what

[Scary But In A Very Different Way]: :)

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: im scared

[Dad™]: Why were you watching a movie at three in the morning??

[wheres my mf juul]: oh god takas awake

[Dad™]: Im sure they’ve noticed. 

[wheres my mf juul]: sassy ass

[Dad™]: I hope you’re still aware I give out 90% of the detention slips. 

[Cool Guy Syndrome]: and i oo


End file.
